There’s no real gratitude chakra, but I feel like there should be. I feel like we yoga teachers should be asking our students where they feel gratitude. Where do you? Where do you feel that sense that things are good and you’re happy to have it good? In you gut? In your heart? At the base of who you are?
Our sense of well-being comes from the root chakra, but is gratitude about a sense of well-being? I honestly don’t know. There is disagreement about whether the heart, naval or sacral chakra gets to claim gratitude.
I know that when I feel lucky to be alive, lucky to be a mom, lucky to know my husband and lucky to have work that I’m passionate about and constantly challenged by I feel that my heart is full. At the best times I feel that if life got any better my heart might burst. It almost hurts. I’m one of those rare people that when things are really awesome, really touching…like the fireflies lighting up the steamy July night as my kids run half naked across the vast green lawn laughing wildly, when times are that amazing…I cry. Well, I get that lump. And if I can’t swallow it down I do actually cry. I can’t help it. I just do.
Embarrassingly enough I also cry at almost any concert or performance. I am just so overwhelmed by people sharing their creative energy and having the guts to belt a tune, emote, twist, float, soar and be their most authentic selves. And if that’s not amazing enough I’m humbled by their ability and willingness to share it with me.
My gratitude list today is about how I feel as well.
I’m grateful for….
1. My Family…..My kids and my husband really put up with a lot and stand behind me and help me be a better person. I feel tickled, lucky and so damn grateful that they allow me the space to be me. I’m not easy and on a daily basis at least one of them is happy to see me, wants my opinion and kisses/hugs/snuggles with me.
2. Blogging….I know this sounds kooky, but I LOVE blogging. I love spewing my mind and knowing that at least two people read it and one sometimes comments. I feel very lucky that I’m inspired/stupid/creative enough to enjoy doing it so much. I’ve always wanted to write and now I get to. It’s a feeling of freedom and happiness. Sometimes it’s stress and feeling less than worthy/able and just plain dread.
3. Being 40. Really, is this not awesome? I can’t imagine that there’s a better age. I love the sense of power/love/strength/clarity I have now that I’ve entered my 40s. I hope 5o is better, but I’m kinda doubting it. So I’m just going to live it up for the next ten years! I guess the feeling is luck, incredulity, and glee.
4. The friends that make me look forward to my life…….yeah, kinda long. Kinda cheezy, but I’m ok with it. I have always had wonderfully strong, awesome women in my life. From all ages and all walks of life I have learned so much. Recently, I have been blessed enough to fall in with a wonderful group of strong, “quality, mojo women”. They remind me of who I am, who I was and who I can be. Thank you. The only feeling here is gratitude.
5. Resilience. By the Grace of Somebody I learned to be resilient. There were a lot of years I thought the hurt would swallow me up. I thought that the bad was bigger than me and I would just be scooped up by it. Luckily, I had some weird inner reservoir of strength and I held on. And I’m so happy/thankful/lucky I did. Because now it’s good and I wouldn’t be here without the bad. So the feeling is love. I know it’s weird, but it really is. My heart is full when I think of how far I’ve come and how my life is good and full and happy now. My life is not perfect, but I’m able to find that place where I can find some peace and good in it.