A few weekends ago (well, six now) was the confab of Pinky Tuscadera’s Assasins-don’t ask it’s probably more confusing to me than you. It was the second annual gathering of marginally friendly people from college. Well, to be fair I’m probably the odd woman out. I got invited to hang out with a group of women that knew each other fairly well in college. We went to one of those small liberal arts schools, so small that we all knew OF each other. Now we know and love each other completely.
As for the name? I thought we were going to be something like The Fuck It-I’m 40 group, but I missed the memo and frankly, I’m just so happy to be included it really doesn’t matter to me. BUT we took the assasin name to a fun place I never expected. Our first drunken night together, about three hours off the planes and much earlier than last year, we bought baby water guns. We shrieked and chased and got seriously wet. Imagine seven, 40-something, drunk, usually repsonsible, screaming, giggling women in the lake house next door, rushing out of the house in a fit of laughter squirting each other with teeny, tiny purple, orange green and yellow water guns. I think at some point someone put booze in theirs and I know I used hot water.
This second get together was fabulous, just like last year, and in some ways drastically different from last year. There was so much laughter my face and abs still hurt-and that’s probably more so than last year just because we know each other better. My stomach couldn’t take the Caiprihinas this year, I learned some amazing new things about my fellow assassins and some wonderfully amazing things about myself.
It was cold, cloudy and rainy the entire four days and we didn’t do one thing that we planned. Well, Knuckles played guitar and sang-and while I’m not sure that it was planned I think it was very well wished for by everyone. I videotaped it, not to share, but because Knuckles’ playing has always fed my soul in a way that I don’t often experience. (PTA’s…it’s awesome. I’m gearing up to send it or share it very soon.)
There were terribly insightful tarot readings for all. Some of us cried and some cackled in delight. We all agreed that whatever we believed about our lives, the cards confirmed. And we’re going to do follow-up readings via phone, a feature not offered last year. AND we did readings together, which was new.
We talked, discussed, analyzed and commiserated. The PTA’s have the uncanny ability to support, love and take care of each other in ways you wouldn’t know you needed or asked for and it’s the most perfect nurturing I’ve experienced. I’ve never had the universe lead me to a better place. This group of seven has such gifts, I’ve never known. There are those of us who are straight-shooters, sages, nurturers, comics and wild cards.
I’ve always had a sense that women are strong beyond belief, wise, powerful and awesome. I have NEVER hated being a woman and this group reminds me why. I’ve been blessed to know some crazy talented women. This weekend only highlights that for me.
A few months ago I was chatting with another PTA member and she was lamenting that we all came together so late. And this year she observed that for a few years after school we all disappeared into a black hole. And I’ve been thinking about that a lot. I think we needed to disappear, to let go of our teenage/early adult selves and find a different voice for ourselves. Some of us did some crazy things, some of were figuring out things, some of us found love and got married. But what’s curious to me is that while our lives turned out differently, 20 years later there is still that thread that made us friends and acquaintances. in the first place.
More than last year I came home to find I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be. I feel eager about the future and curious about how our next gathering will find everyone.
I’m sure we will be meeting until we can’t anymore and it’s a wonderful blessing. These are my soul sisters, the women who help me be the best that I can be. Not by harsh words, or didatic tactics they teach and love me no matter what. And what’s astounding? That we connect thru email, FB, Twitter and Skype, but the group only gathers once a year.
I’ve always wondered about people who have strong support groups and now I’m lucky enough to be one of those people.